The truth we dont want to admit is that mostly we get it wrong.
Most men get it wrong.
They have no clue what they are doing when it comes to women and dating.
You take one look at the divorce rate of almost 50% and you realize that men are unconsciously walking into relationships that they can't handle.
Or they have no idea how to handle it.
Most are just not equipped as men to deal with a relationship in a modern world, with modern challenges in ancient bodies.
The problem with ancient bodies in modern worlds is that we get short-circuited.
We think that because we live in a modern world that somehow our problems come from modern sources.
But the truth is that it all leads back to that same old path.
The path of human evolution dates back millions of years.
And because most men dont know about this story, most don't know how their own actions are built upon this ancient human story.
They also dont understand that the women they deal with have the same human story.
But she is playing on a different team with a different set of unspoken rules that is always around just under the surface.
So a man goes on a date.
The women he just met for a date is very attractive and feminine.
She seems quite stable, she seems confident mature, and in control.
She looks like she has high self-esteem.
Of course, all the man sees is a beautiful woman.
He thinks that things are going really well.
Because in a way they are going well.
The problem is the man is not prepared for what is about to happen.
What happens is the pleasant conversation the man is having ends.
Out of nowhere she suddenly makes a remark about his hair.
The remark is not exactly rude, but it's not friendly.
She tells the man,”Interesting hairstyle” with a grin on her face.
The man is confused and immediately goes on the defensive.
He starts telling her that he just had a haircut and he is not happy with it.
He also asks her if she thinks he should change it?
He tells her he is going to change his hairstyle as soon as he gets home.
So the date ends.
The man never hears from the women again.
For a few weeks after the date he tried to call her but no answer.
After a few weeks, she texts him back and tells him that she doesn't think it's going to work out.
The man ends up frustrated.
Was it his hair?
Or something else he said?
Things were “going so well.”
What he doesn't realize is that the women didn't care about his hairstyle.
She was testing him and he failed.
She wanted to see how he would react if she “attacked ” him with a curveball.
Would he go all defensive and get nervous?(Yes he did.)
Or would he stay calm and easily manage the situation by laughing it off.
These kinds of tests happen all the time.
They happen on dates.
They happen in relationships of 3 weeks,3 months,3 years, and 30 years.
It's in the nature of women to test men in direct or indirect ways to see if the man they are with is worth it?
Because women always have the nagging question in the back of their minds:
This question never leaves them, even in a marriage.
And most men never get that this is a test.
And like I mentioned before this leads to the breakup of relationships around the world every day.
The problem with most men is that they think once they are with the girl they can relax.
They are good.
The girl said yes to the date so now he can relax.
Or the girl is dating him now so now he can relax.
Or he just got married so finally he can relax.
This leads to so much unhappiness and pain that you can write millions of books of all the sad stories around the world.
So when men ask me when they can relax they are always surprised by my answer.
The answer is ” Never! “
You Will Always Be Tested.
Sure you can relax in a general type of way.
But dont think your women will ever stop testing you.
Remember as men we are always being tested by life.
She has a deep evolutionary drive deep inside of her that reminds her to make sure the man she is with is switched on ready to defend her and her family.
And if you think about it objectively she is right to be worried.
Take one look around your local supermarket on a weekend and you will see an army of mediocre men being led by women that realized their men are not the leaders.
So guess what?
These women took control.
They became the leaders.
Because they are not sure that these men can lead them.
So their nature is to take control if the men are weak.
You Need To Be Squared Away.
This all comes back to men not realizing that you have to be squared away in life.
As a masculine man, you need to have your shit together.
You need to show strength and courage.
You need to be a protector.
You need to be on your mission.
You need to be living these principles and not be a pretender.
And she will test you to make sure that you are.
When You Make Her The Center Of Your Universe.
If she becomes the center of your universe she realizes only one thing:
If she can distract you so easily from your mission then how can you be successful with your mission?
And this realization makes her nervous.
Also realize that the more beautiful, feminine, and high self-esteem the woman is the more she will test you and the more intense the tests will be.
And if you dont know how to handle it the relationship will not last very long.
In the end, all of this is not about her.
It's Not About Her.
It's about you.
Many men go into relationships to get away from their own lives.
They do it to feel safe.
To not feel lonely.
To get away from the real world.
To avoid challenging themselves.
But women are incapable of loving weakness.
What these men don't realize is that women can't love them in the way they want to be loved.
Many men think they live in a romantic comedy movie where a woman will “just accept him the way he is.”
These men are doomed.
Again just look at official divorce statistics to prove my point.
You need to be out there in the world showing courage and strength.
You should be facing your fears.
Yous should be getting stronger, smarter, and wiser.
You should be constantly getting better.
You should be the type of man that makes her feel safe when you are with her.
The type of man that is unaffected by her tests.
When men dont show strength in terms of who they are as a man alarm bells start going off for the women.
This lack of personal responsibility makes women nervous.
You might fool a woman by being a fake person for a night, week, or even a few years.
But if you dont get yourself squared away eventually the cracks will start showing and it will end badly.
You Have To Take Control Of Yourself.
So realize now if you dont step up for yourself first then you won't be able to step up for her.
You need to take a long hard look at yourself before you choose to go into a long term relationship or even think of starting a family.
You need to be able to be water when it comes to women's tests.
You need to become fire when the world confronts you.
When you live your mission and you are in control of your mission she will feel your strength.
And she will see you easily overcome all her tests.
Then she will calm down but she will test you again with the confidence that you can handle it.
Then it will become fun and the test will be a dance between the 2 of you.
Like you you lead everything else in life.
Until next time…